Store

If you’re in the US, willing to order through PayPal’s secure site with your credit card or PayPal account, and willing to have your order shipped via US Mail, you can order merch directly from me. This is basically me mailing stuff to you. $30 or more and I’ll pay the postage. Prices for Indiana residents include sales tax. The checkout button will take you to PayPal. None of your financial info goes through captainambivalent.com. PayPal lets me know you paid and passes along your address. Thank you for your support!
Front Cover

 $5 Save The Orcs CD (shrink-wrapped retail packaging)
$10 Pirate Ninja Zombie CD (shrink-wrapped retail packaging w/ lyric book)
$15 Pirate Ninja Zombie T-Shirt (album cover art on blue Bayside heavyweight 100% preshrunk cotton T, made in USA, union printed)
Size :
$10 Fear The Accordion CD (shrink-wrapped retail packaging w/ lyric book)
$15 Fear The Accordion T-Shirt (album cover art on gold Bayside heavyweight 100% preshrunk cotton T, made in USA, union printed)
Size :
 $5 Genuine Croakies XL glasses straps, made in USA. Keep your eyewear in place while rafting, roller-coastering, biking, dancing, etc. Silver with black text “You Might Call Me Captain Ambivalent – And Then Again You Might Not”.
 $5 Fannypack MockupFanny pack! Black with oval Captain Ambivalent logo. My friends are laughing at me for these. The nineties will never die!
Dig the boots? Order them from Amazon using the link below and I get a small commission! Thank you for your support.


Perhaps you’ve heard of Welcome Your Neighbors or seen their multilingual yard signs. But they didn’t have one in Klingon and Elvish so I fixed that. Print one up and put it in your yard!

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